What makes you happy?
Different people are happy doing different things. So, lets know a few things that make us happy.
- When society respects you for your status or social work/charity or knowledge?
- When you get the thing you want?
- When you achieve what your family expects from you?
- When someone appreciates you?
- When you get a better boy/girl friend, a better job/business, a better home, vacation, car, mobile handset, jewelry, etcetera than your friends and family?
- When your family and staff is obedient and completely under your control?
- When you bully others or crack joke on them or criticize/argue and successfully prove your point of view?
- When you party, have multiple girlfriends/ rich boyfriends, dope, unlimited money, expensive cars, bungalow, glamor?
Most of these things mean a lot to normal people but mean nothing to the wise.
As you can see, happiness of people is not always for doing good things, sometimes they enjoy evil things. In fact in most cases they want things that bring bad later-effects. So how can one be completely happy? Impossible as long as they don’t change their worldly desires. And for that they need to change no one but themselves. They need to criticize/argue with nobody but themselves. And this is impossible for most of us.
Therefore, complete happiness is unachievable as long as we are alive with this body and living on earth.
Ambition and Wishes Never End
You get happiness when you get what you want. But the problem is that the joy of achieving that thing does not remain with you for long. And soon you start craving for another thing; and you start the struggle/efforts for achieving the new target. This goes on and on and then you marry and have children. Now you get happiness when you achieve what you, your spouse, and your children want. And now you make even more efforts till you get old and weak. So, where’s the complete happiness?
Complete happiness is not easy to achieve as our mind doesn’t get satisfied with what we have achieved in life. It will always keep craving for what we don’t have. For some it could be money, or health, or perfect body, or fame, or time to spend with family & friends, or peace, or a better spouse, or obedient children or more & more money, etcetera.
True Happiness Lies Within
The best you can do is to stop craving for what you don’t have. Be satisfied with what you have. The body you have, the job you have, the parents, and family you have, the car you have, the home you have, just be satisfied. Krishna says “A person who is content with the self alone, who is steady, needs nothing from anyone.”
To start with, keep your requirements limited. We definitely need to do something to meet our and family’s financial needs. But if you aim to lead a simple life, not competing with anyone, then you will be able to keep the requirements very limited.
Surely, it is easier said than done and it takes a lot of effort, and understanding of life and maturity to reach a stage when you see no real gain in achieving what everyone else in the society is craving for.
Learning to live alone, mostly cut off from the society can help as then you don’t have the pressure of competing with the society, so called friends, and relatives, who would never understand the meaning and importance of staying satisfied, peaceful and calm. If you stay with them, they will showoff, boast of material things, and so on. You or your family can get negatively affected by it. Maya is not easy to ignore. You can discipline yourself, but making others understand is tough even if its your spouse or children.
In rare cases where your partner is also largely satvik, you may be able lead a simple happy life while staying at home or with a likeminded friend. This is important because only then you will be able to do what you really want to do. Without caring for what people will think of the way you are living your life.
Also, cut your expectations from everyone. Don’t expect anything from your parents, spouse, children, relatives, or anyone else. Not even appreciation for your benevolent love and all that you may have done for them. Because if you are not expecting something from your family, or boss, or community, then you can not fail and you can not get disappointed with anyone. (Selfless love always comes back; but not necessarily from the same person.)
Become a Non-Doer – Just a Witness.
Simply witness the short events of happiness and sorrow while not getting too much excited or depressed about these life events. They are but two sides of the same coin. And nothing is permanent. They keep coming and going.
Will we become completely happy if we follow the steps above?
No, but you will achieve maximum possible peace and happiness.
==
Don’t Agree? OK, Chase Your Goals & Learn from Your Life
Humans are not interested in logic. They refuse to learn from other people’s experiences. All they care about is their point of view.
They see successful people and celebrities publicly declaring that they did not achieve happiness after accumulating wealth, fame, and status.
They see people leaving their high paying jobs and adopting Sannyasa. But still they don’t change their point of view.
They believe others have done mistakes that they won’t. And they will set an example to the society. If this is you, go chase the success you want and become happy. Best of Luck!